Sunday, June 12, 2011

Fare for Friends: Why We Need Our Gals

"Friendship isn't a big thing - it's a million little things." 
-Author Unknown


I have really been thinking a lot lately about the importance of friends in one's life. I mean, I have always known that they were important but I guess with a little age, children, jobs, etc, etc, friends often end up taking a backseat...or maybe even the the business that is your mutually busy lives.

Last night I had a fun, rare night out with a few friends. It was a really great time. Coincidentally (or as fate would have it I think maybe) we bumped into some other friends from high school who were out celebrating the birthday of a girl we all knew but was also part of this extremely tight-knit group of girlfriends. She was an amazing woman, wife and mother who lost her life to cancer in her late thirties. Some came to Toronto from out of town, like we're talkin Ottawa - to honer their friend. And I think that is awesome. You can't buy friendship like that. These are "no matter what" friends. It was beautiful to see and reminded me just how much we need our girlfriends in our lives. How much that special companionship and love is a very special thing indeed.

We are complex beings, us gals, and we need to connect (not just hang out, drink beer, watch sporting events and fart - although that can be a perfectly fun evening at times). We need to spill our guts out and laugh till it hurts and cry till we're dry and be all neurotic and analytical and goofy and emotional. We need our girls. Guys are good for many things, but a guy will never be your girlfriend (OK, there are a few exceptions to that rule perhaps but that is a whole different post!)

I had the words to this all wrong my entire life!

I have a number of friends who I have known most of my life and who I consider my closest. I am also the type of person who really enjoys meeting new people and developing new that is good, but these close friends have young children, some have jobs outside the home, some live quite far and the running around that comes with all of that is always the excuse for not seeing each other. Or even talking to each other in some cases. And not that we don't want to talk. And not that we don't have the time to talk.

We just don't make that time a priority.

We say "we should get together in the summer", but the snow starts falling and you still haven't connected.

And people do change. But those certain friends...those "lifers"...they are there and they are probably feeling the same way you are. They same way I feel. Guilty. And yes, I feel guilty about that.


I am very grateful for the new and very special friendships I am currently building in my life, but I do miss my core gals. I have been working on a lot of things in my home to make having them over easier like getting eating and sitting areas set up outside along with a gazebo, getting my dining room to function better both for my family and for larger gatherings, etc. I hope this will help. I hope that BBQ I want to have with a big bunch of friends happens. I hope my to do list won't take me over as it usually does.

"Cheers" to girlfriends. (And to wine with girlfriends!)

Because my girlfriends need to be on that list. They need to get a little higher on that list.

They need not be pushed aside by guilt and excuses. They need to be there.

I need to be there.



Suggested Reading


  1. Have you ever read the poem Season, Reason, Lifetime? (Google It)

  2. Lora - I have to admit there is a tear in my eye as I read this... I too have felt the same way for many years. Life is so damn busy - but it's too damn short to not make time for old friends... the ones who will always be there for you... YES I'm talking about YOU! I miss you desperately!! We have known each other for so long (christ - is it 34 years???) and I will make it MY PROMISE to see you more (so long as I don't get sick.. lol). I love you.. thank you for posting this.

  3. Jarvis...I will check it out as I don't think I have. Thanks! know you are one of my "lifers" and this was for you and a few others. You know who you are. Xx I appreciate the comment. :) love you.

  4. Hi Lora,
    This is such a beautiful post! Yes, definite tears over here too. You are a beautiful person, and I truly amazing friend!!
    Love Julie xo

  5. Sooo...good Poem? :P I will be ready for a Guest Blog soon. ALso if you would like some help with a new website design...I can do it - we should talk :)

  6. Your blog always leaves me feeling uplifted. Thank you for sharing your optimism with us. I highly recommend the Core Ball Game to anyone looking for a fun online game. Play it today!